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>>625592 is autosaging so here we go with a video.
First post in hopes of Chris getting the real help he needs. Whatever it is at this point.
It's interesting how he's actually begun to assimilate into internet culture rather than getting his entire worldview from E rated games, childrens TV and adult cartoons. I can't imagine him doing this in the classic chris days. Also jim better hurry up and do the barb video, stop wasting time poking your chopsticks in the yellow rice you faggot
>wanting the wild ride to end
Third post in hopes of the opposite
I hope your grandma's wild ride on my dick never ends #lolowned
Archive of previous thread
Thread ended in suggestions of running a #ThotAudit on Chris
The official Fanta twitter replied in a Chris thread, after everyone was laughing at them, it was deleted.
I'd have archived it but I was at work on my phone and couldn't bother. At least someone saved a screenshot.
Fucking hell I know I selected the image. Fix your site.
That ship sailed a long time ago.
Probably a bot. Any time Fanta is said they jump in and reply to it with a silly message.
Nothing has changed with Chris's influences. They're the same as they have ever been. You're as retarded as he is if you think cartoons can be for adults.
>Probably a bot. Any time Fanta is said they jump in and reply to it with a silly message.
Not the brightest idea. It didn't take long until people started posting .gifs of Chris drinking his Fanta cum.
I'm fairly sure he's been reported to social security before and nothing came of it. That was different times though, so who knows. He is probably violating almost all of the rules SSI has in place.
> $2000 asset limit not including car/home
He's got more than that in legos alone, and yes, shit like that counts
> unreported income from Ebay/Etsy
If they knew about this, they would reduce his check
> his e-begging and general waste of funds
This one is a grey area, but he's supposed to be spending that money on bills, and if they knew he was blowing it on vidya and legos, it'd be reduced.
>I'm fairly sure he's been reported to social security before
Yes, social security not the IRS
>He is probably violating almost all of the rules SSI has in place
But he's on SSDI, they don't have an asset limit
>but…but…I have excuses
Chris has violated the earned income limits several months this year. He demonstrates he doesn't need disability, and he can earn money like every other person, or he can suck dicks like the gag he is.
Of course, anon. Adults can only work themselves to death 8+ hours a day to pay taxes and buy alcohol after all. Leisure activities are for fags.
Who the fuck are you trying to impress?
>You're as retarded as he is if you think cartoons can be for adults.
So Bible Black is for kids?
Not kids more like fags.
>or he can suck dicks like the gag he is.
What is it with fags in this thread constantly wanting Chris to suck dick?
>not having the hots for chris
Chris is gay, like you.
Best PR move Fanta has ever made, official softdrink of lulz.
Anyone have a webm of the smashmouth merge?
It’s the last thread
Did you guys not see that he killed another cat? The tweet was like four days ago.
Iirc he just confirmed one of his older ones was dead?
What happened to that one?
According to the cwcki its been 3356 days since chris has applied to a job. Anyone wanna take bets how long he'll go? 4000? 5000? Surely in a few years he will indeed apply to a job out of desperation (not a job he would get mind, but would apply).
It probably died.
Chris will never get a job unless court ordered. Period. Even if he was forced as a stipulation of probation or the like he wouldn't be able to hold it down for longer than a few weeks.
What kind of fantasy is this?
Would you want to work another day in your life if you had a limitless trust fund in your imaginary magical fantasy world? Didn't think so.
Chris continues his targeted harassment of Tara Strong.
I would, honestly. Keeps people from trying to hit me up for money if they think I'm an Average Joe.
Calling it now. Chris-Chan will ether try to grope Tara strong at a con or attempt to rape her.
So what ever happened with the merge? Did he explain why it didn't happen or is he just ignoring it?
Chris posted 3 new videos, 1 about the weather and 2 about cereal.
Maybe someone wants to download them for.. the sake of archival? I'm sure any and all footage is going to be of some relevance in order to show his descent into madness once someone makes another documentary on him, after the tragic murder suicide he'll commit or when he gets gunned down after visiting one of his victims IRL.
Is there a decent program or trick to grabbing Twitter videos? I don't really trust any of the search results, seems like an easy normalfag trap to put something malicious into such an often looked for program.
Nah, just talk to her. And security will go apeshit on chris. he'll get kicked out and get home to find out he's being sued by her and planet dolan. or at least face charges from her.
i dont think chris is dumb enough to visit an armed megan. but i could definitely see him getting tazed (his victim is likely to be female and have a taser) and then have a heart attack. then die. i think being zapped to the extreme to the grave would be a fitting end to chris.
>i think being zapped to the extreme to the grave would be a fitting end to chris.
That would be a fine way for him to go but not until we get some closure on "The Merge" arc. It has the potential to turn into a schizophrenic sperg-out of rarely seen proportions.
Is this someone pulling a gay-op on Chris? That bio just feels too perfectly tailored towards him.
Saw the account because Chris retweeted some drawing
Oh definitely agreed with you there. Rather a fitting end to such an episode. Preferably at the hands of one of his galpals.
I suppose he'll retcon it. He can never admit his sonichu lore is ever wrong, he just finds a way to forcefit it into newer lore
Probs. I can only imagine the number of simultaneous shit-teir opps that have been attempted over the years.
Chris said end of the year, there's still time
Tara WEAK deserves everything bad and more.
You more or less need to screenrecord anymore. Twatterniggers changed shit up so the mobile.twitter.com variant doesn't use the browser-native video embed anymore, so you can't just turn it to the mobile version, start playing, and do the right click->save as method.
youtube-dl is your friend
That Silence of the Lambs reference. Nice.
BRB, gotta watch that fucking movie again
He's not going to kill Megan in time.
Not if Megan kills him first.
<Remembered this post from last thread
>You can go to someone's wishlist and say you purchased it else where for them and it will mark it bought.
Who knew a retarded autist could be as self-absorbed and materialistic as the majority of the rest of the shitty world?
You don’t know the half of it. Look at this faggotry.
He was a jew this whole time.
Was bored, so used a burner number and texted chris, guess what he fucking replied. So using the ways of talking to a 5 year old, manage to get some dumb shit about the merge and why he needs new toys. kinda surprised he actually responded, chris must be fucking lonely out of his mind
Hey Chris. It would be nice if I had a 55 foot yacht and free gasoline for the rest of my life, but it's not going to happen, and it's wrong to depend on others to provide that for me.
Dude is a loser because he wants to be.
There he goes again.
Even after all these years sometimes I just want to beat the shit out of CWC.
His new list also had a PS4, Xbone, some games and transformer figures.
The eternal child CWC. I havent really pined for anything material for years and years. Getting older has that benefit.
Is it possible to buy the shit, open the box, break it, and then send it to him?
>Is it possible to waste money
<for sweet julay
It doesn't matter. I only need to make sure he can't return it, like have some pieces missing, or cover it with cow manure or something.
What, do you think he'll flip out, hit record on his PS4 cam and start screaming about his shitty gift?
I mean, someone sent horse shit to him once, and he only mentioned it in passing like years later.
Why does Christ need to replace 2 game consoles? They're pretty hard to break/
That could make a fantasic movie.
Why not just send him shit in a box?
You don't belong here.
Something about sending biohazard material doesn't seem legal without proper licenses.
Plus, I want to really squeeze the lemon juice into the wound by showing him something he wants that is completely destroyed and worthless.
I mean it's your money, but personally I wouldn't feel an emotional payoff without witnessing his reaction and he may very likely not mention it at all like the other anon suggested.
And can you really get prosecuted for sending faeces in the mail? Simply don't add a return address. It's not like the cops are going to run DNA tests to catch someone sending literal shit to some unimportant autist.
>but personally I wouldn't feel an emotional payoff without witnessing his reaction
>he may very likely not mention it at all like the other anon suggested
Then we need to set up an anon close to his house and coordinate with the delivery of the item according to the tracking.
Once we see that Chris gets it, have anon run up and capture his reaction.
Maybe wearing a giant pickle suit.
I will even spring for that.
>And can you really get prosecuted for sending faeces in the mail?
>It's not like the cops are going to run DNA tests to catch someone sending literal shit to some unimportant autist.
It's a federal crime. They don't care. They will run fingerprints and DNA on that sucker quick.
>Then we need to set up an anon close to his house and coordinate with the delivery of the item according to the tracking.
>Once we see that Chris gets it, have anon run up and capture his reaction.
>Maybe wearing a giant pickle suit.
>I will even spring for that.
I'm all for it theoretically speaking but I fear the money and time investment is a bit high compared to the chance of witnessing his reaction. Though I wish you all the best in your endeavours, I'm a Eurofag so can't really partake in any physical or mail-trolling.
>It's a federal crime. They don't care. They will run fingerprints and DNA on that sucker quick.
Get a new box you've never been near, wear gloves when stealing or buying it. Put fresh animal shit in it or pay a hobo $5 to defecate in it.
Wear gloves when packaging and posting it. It's cheaper than a Switch. Speaking of cheaper than a Switch, if you're sending him a destroyed item, go for a Transformer rather than a console. He really seemed to have a hardon for those and they're much cheaper.
>go for a Transformer
>He really seemed to have a hardon for those
Chris is really disgusting. I just want him to have his hopes lifted and then their wings ripped off so they hurdle back to reality.
>sending broken item
I don't want him to be able to return it. I guess I can cut off the UPC label? But I think the sight of receiving something desired yet not earned and then losing it all in an instant will really hurt him.
There is no way he won't tweet about it, especially if he tweeted so much about his wishlist, even to Amazon.
Chris is self-absorbed and is defined by material things. That is something easily julayed.
I don't know how return policies work in the US, but wont he be unable to get a replacement or his (your) money back unless he possesses some type of 'proof of purchase' like a receipt? While it wouldn't hurt to remove the UPC label, I don't think it matters?
Some places, like Wal-Mart, have very aggressive return policies that allow people to return items without receipts but they can only get store credit.
I figure, without the UPC, he won't be able to return it anywhere.
Also even with a receipt I think many stores would decline the return of an item that has been severely brutalized with a hammer as opposed to some minor malfunction/production error.
>I think many stores would decline the return of an item that has been severely brutalized with a hammer
This is what I am hoping for, but I don't want him to be able to say it was "damaged in shipping".
Break it with a hammer, light it on fire, then spray paint the fucker.
Never a dull moment with Chris.
How long would Chris survive following a nationwide EMP?
>(1) posting on /cow/ of all places
>chris is really dithguthting ehhhhhhhhhh
Go back to tumblr, queerbag. Jesus. You're striking me very hard as the type of fag that's angry with this retard and want to see him hurt because he said something bad about fags and niggers before.
Imagine handling the ScrewAttack twitter account and waking up to this notification.
No one cares about Chris here.
We only want to see the julay.
Chris' already looking like a LISA character.
Not all animation is cartoons, anon.
What the fuck is this shit?
Chris is a documented asshole. Only a faggot would like an asshole.
2 INT brainlet spotted. This is /cow/, a place to laugh at lolcows, not moralize over dumb shit.
Yes, that was my point though.
Is Screw Attack still doing the Death Battle shit? I remember watching years ago one episode with Goomba VS Koopa and I thought it was a neat one-off parody of those stupid versus TV shows. But to think they have been riding that stupid gimmick for so long is pure autism.
>he thinks he's going to go to war with an anime girl if some youtube video doesn't get changed
A thousand times this because she's a sjw ass-hole. Tara's rumored to have rape fantasies, but I think it's safe to say she'd rather get raped by Brad Pitt than an autistic tranny.
>but I think it's safe to say she'd rather get raped by Brad Pitt
Not really rape then, is it?
Do you have brain damage?
>b-bleas don't bully retard
>go to tumblr for wanting to fuck with a retard
Smells like projection
>Its Sonic Blue arms again
>And now its in an ugly & realistic style, for maximun damage to any autistic and also normal brain
OH BOY OH BOY. Any reaction of Chris about this already?
>Blue armed Sonic in theaters across the country
>Pmurt wins reelection
What the fuck is going to happen to him?
>the extremely rare chance of getting his shit together saga
That's pretty much it for him
Why does everything have to be a saga? This ain't Dragon Ball motherfucker
someone tweet it at him
Do you know how many views they get from autistic manchildren arguing 24/7 about how their dad can beat your dad?
I suppose it's not unlike how the Koran was written.
>From the producers of FnF
>kinda surprised he actually responded, chris must be fucking lonely out of his mind
Idea Guy took his money and fried his mind yet Chris hadn't had that much excitement or interaction with people in years.
I think its a distinct possibility that Chris might not even care about the Sonic movie as he doesn't believe that it will come out before the Merge.
>from the producer of the fast and the furious
Okay this can't fucking be real. Which one of you faggots made this?
I know it sounds like a massive shitpost tailored for Chris but as I live and breathe, its real.
Maybe he's right, maybe we are approaching a merge if this shit is now commonplace.
I still have my doubts, but even if it isn't I have an idea. If someone that isn't complete shit with photoshop wants to shop the official poster into a sonichu one and then congratulate Chris on twitter about getting his widely beloved franchise made into a movie I think the reaction to that might be neat.
Shat this out quickly, surely there's no way he'd actually fall for this, right?
Fixed the shadowing a bit.
That's pretty good.
Why doesn't it say Sonichu tho?
More believeable. I'm assuming he already knows there's a sonic movie out, seems like it'd make more sense for Sonichu to be a supporting character in the Sonic movie instead of its own character. But why the fuck am I applying logic tbh.
Also I don't have the sonic font and I'm lazy as shit.
I fucked up with the last image, here's the basic shadow fix. Was tempted to shop in the tail from detective pikachu but couldn't get the levels right. Maybe someone more autistic than myself with ps can figure it out.
>But why the fuck am I applying logic tbh
I guess whoever tweets can tell him
>Sonichu to be a supporting character in the Sonic movie
which makes sense, at least to me.
>Was tempted to shop in the tail from detective pikachu but couldn't get the levels right.
It looks good to me as is. I am surprised how fast you were able to take the concept and produce the work.
I would really like to see some julay out of this old lolcow.
Hopefully it won't be sour.
I'm planning to get a burner phone just to call Chris after new year and ask for objective proof of the Merge
Forgive me for ignorance, I've been away from the internet for months, but why does the CWCki no longer show Chris updates?
Lower the brightness
I can see all the artifacts in the thumbnail
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Chris-Chan gonna go full Randy stair by killing someone over the live action sonic movie? Is Chris-Chan running a cult?
You are forgiven. I believe I read it was due to lack of contributors. It a good resource for beginners but that is all.
This is a ligit option now. The merge will fail, barb will sunset, Chris will be evicted. All he will have is war against those BLUE ARMS
>Implying the merge will fail
>Not having your OC ready
Non-believers going to get wrecked
>All he will have is war against those BLUE ARMS
Only the man in the pickle suit can save us.
How many Chris memes do you think are going to be in that movie? Someone on the crew MUST know about him. I'm thinking 2 to 3.
What's the summary here?
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It's around 3:50.
He's gotta be SEGA's boogeyman.
Chris has been an eldritch being this entire time, seeing beyond the veil that we cannot penetrate. He's the herald of an outter god at this point boys.
I've seen another Sega dude laughing about arm colour but I can't find it.
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If Chris gets $500 in donations he will release a full video house tour 2.0
Totally worth it, let him continue on the path to become a cam whore.
Why does it look like a midget in a werewolf costume?
Lookin' good hun. I guess Chris got jealous of all the attention Barb was getting for looking like she's on death's door.
He stumbles over his words and then at 2:00 claims he gets headaches from the psychic connections he's having.
2:30 he says he's half Sonichu and will be able to transform into Sonichu for real soon.
3:00 he says he's absorbed "The Spiral" referring to the Sega Dreamcast logo.
3:12 he hocks up a loogie and explains that Destiny and Power are inside of him.
It gets even more loopy from there. if you've ever visited the "Gang Stalking" thread here, all of this insane babble is familiar to you. I wonder if he's able to hold in even 10% of his power level with the public anymore because this is straight up crazy guy in the gutter sort of shit.
>2:30 he says he's half Sonichu and will be able to transform into Sonichu for real soon.
>3:12 he hocks up a loogie and explains that Destiny and Power are inside of him.
That's power all right.
>hold in even 10% of his power level
If he is holding back from dressing around like that in public, I don't want to see what he'd really be like.
I'm surprised that I've never made this connection before, it's spot on.
Fucking hell, he's really gonna try to kill / kidnap Megan.
I got that too.
Something bad is coming.
>he says he's absorbed "The Spiral" referring to the Sega Dreamcast logo
This is too fucking insane for my taste, Nukkake tier shiet.
Maybe he will finally take his van over the center median and crash into a family of 5 killing all of them plus the family dog and cat?
He has ran over Michael Snyder twice, plus wheeled his mother into running Snyder over, which she got a felony on her record from.
At this point that would be a bullet
Showing this video to anyone that isnt a raging SJW and they'll same thing: this man is insane
what the fuck
>Aaron is on /cow/ now
Just wait until he starts spamming Mark porn.
Chris chan is a homosexual.
He wears fucking shitty clothes.
He does gay shit like get his taint pierced and make jerk off videos.
He is sick and what makes him worse is that he won't help himself while demanding everyone else give him their time and money so he can have his toys.
Fuck Chris chan.
And fuck you too you pussy bitch bfbc87.
You can't use a consistent ID?
Too scary for you?
You nameless fuck.
Go somewhere else to make apologies and excuses for Chris chan.
Fuck him and you, his horse that he rode in on.
>what the fuck
Some bent dick cock sucker trying to get a rise out of anyone in the thread.
Probably from that gay chris chan web forum.
Anyone have the other videos? There was one of Barb dancing and one of Chris apologizing for something.
I want to see the one where he punches Barb. All those hoarded foxdick cocks is getting leaked.
Fuck foxdickFarms and all, but the one thing they got right is that you, Michael Jay Hirtes, are a dingleberry on the nasty dry shit-caked ass that is the Chris fandom.
John Holmes or Randy Stairs?
I’m going to assume you mean Sargon Holmes. John Holmes is someone else entirely.
Keep changing your ID faggot.
>he says he's absorbed "The Spiral" referring to the Sega Dreamcast logo.
I take it this is another gay ass wordfilter courtesy of the jannies
Randy shit his pants and did nothing wrong except being a ghost cartoon tranny.
it's not autism anymore it's full blown psychosis.
>shit his pants and did nothing wrong
he took like 50 shots to kill 2 people
with a shotgun
the man never did anything right tbh
Call it bullshit but I am start to think that Ch ris was never autistic to start with, when he was young he was schizotypal, and now he may have some form of disorganized schizophrenia, not all schizos hallucinate but all have delusions.
AFAIK autist can have very weird beliefs due to isolation but they are not delusional, arent they? I am not a shrink anyway, but I have browsed way to much tumblr searching for special snowflakes and femcels to mi lk.
Check the KF thread about the slapping video. The apology video is linked in the OP and the Barb video a few posts down.
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His obsessive fixation on the moment in 2000 when he "invented" Sonichu is pure autistic fixation.
he is such a fucking fake.
>uploaded 11 hours ago
The fuck, is this 2005?
one cannot pretend to be this retarded anon
Chris is a bad person.
He needs to be reminded of it everyday.
I've never seen him look this tired. Has he complained about these headaches before? Do you think something's physically wrong with his head?
This is probably way out in left field, but, what if Chris has a brain tumor? Would explain the headaches and the erratic behavior recently.
Chris always believed Sonichu was real. He's not schizo.
I was thinking the same thing but didn't want to suggest it as it seemed too extreme or ridiculous. But, he has been acting pretty fucking crazy lately, even for Chris.
hes a late 30something year old man
a late 30 something who is taking female hormones and living with his mother. he has never worked, likely eats like a 12yo, and shits around playing console games all day. his financial troubles have increased exponentially, and while this was something he used to ignore, its coming to a head very rapidly. im sure the fact that he may be homeless soon is not entirely lost to him in fact im almost certain this is why the merge fantasy was constructed
some people look tired because they actually are
others, like chris, are tired simply because the act of living their life itself is tiring.
this kind of spiritual fatigue is cumulative
if youre talking like some sort of tumor growing and causing some sort of internal brain injury, id expect if this was the case that we would see a much more dramatic shift in his underlying personality. there certainly is a shift, but its more like an additional bit of crazy atop all the rest, with his initial personality still intact. in cases where traumatic brain injury leads to what youre suggesting, its more often like the original personality is completely overwritten. its usually marked by a sharp increase in aggressive behavior and really rapid mood swings
im not writing it off completely till we see the autopsy, but im also more inclined to say that what were witnessing is an evolution of chris escapist tendencies.
Good thing Chris didn't play football otherwise I'd have to wonder about CTE too.
That sentence looks funny, but I think I know what you mean. Same thought:
He's always believed crazy shit like this (like that Sonichu & CWCville were real and the portal was in his bedroom), but now it's exponentially more intense. It's like believing in angels and then giving them names and then talking to them and then describing how they're about to declare war on earth and what we can do to prepare. The core belief is the same but the intensity has ramped up tremendously.
Do we know if chris is even aware of the return of the blue armed bandit?
I remember thinking he came off as normal when I saw this video 10+ years ago in high school. I thought the whole thing was an elaborate troll and that this was proof. Glad my autism is in remission now.
Also, if it's an elaborate troll then please explain all his art.
I miss Carlos Chantor.
>thought he was normal
<Coming to you live from CWCville today
I think after the merge fizzels out he will focuse on it. Especially if he is made to think the movie is holding the merger back.
Plently of stupid fucking cunts gravitate towards Chris-Chan, I think it pads their ego.
And they always have. A-Log said the same shit whenever he powerlevelled about his own life. He'd always end his bit of autistic underachievement by saying "At least I'm not Chris-chan!".
Hell, that's what A-Logging originally meant. Not so much "RARRRRGHHH! CHRIS SHOULD DIEEEEE!" but spergs with zero to little self-awareness whose life was shit enough they felt the need to say they are better than Chris.